Friday, April 15, 2016

Closure

When you think of it, it's so super important to get the closure on things...

If that does not happen, it keeps on lingering in your mind, you keep thinking what if, keep thinking if it was a right decision or wrong?
Why did it happen? If you had done something differently, could it have changed outcome?
If it would have happened, how different and better life would have been.

It's kind of funny!
Sometimes, it's in your hand to get the things to closure, sometimes you have already moved on or even forgotten. Yet, the closure, the reason about why a certain thing happened the way it did, helps! Helps immensely!

Closure is not just a decision though! Its acceptance of it and understanding of it.
Or a realization that sure things didn't happen the way you wanted, but that was for the better, unlike the way you thought when they happened.

Ok, this is getting a way too abstract... Needs example.

Ummmm.... Ummmmmmm..
Went for a job interview. Your Dream job! Interview was super good! You are sure you are gonna get it.  You so much want this job! It's just right work, good money, seems like a good crowd. You are looking forward to it. Clown called Mind has started to think of breaking this news to your present colleagues and boss. And then...You just get a curt mail, we decided to not proceed with your application, thank you for applying. Apply in future blah blah blah….

Why why why? They should tell me why!
There are times when you resign to this as a fact. There are times when you call and try to figure out. In general, it takes some time for you to accept it. But, it still lingers at the back of your mind.

You cleared a job interview in another company. It’s decent. It has work that you like to do, money is decent and crowd is good. Basically everything that you were looking for. But, somehow in one corner of your heart, you are still not happy. Not fully happy. In frustrated moments, you still feel, I should have got my dream job! I would have done wonders then...It's just going on for the sake of it right now.

Interestingly you cannot be 100% sure about how things would have panned out, if you would have actually got the dream job. Maybe you would have flourished or maybe you would have got overwhelmed. You are just in love with the idea of you achieving what you thought you would. And you keep thinking what if in your mind, now and then, sometime in between...

Then one day, you are walking down the road. You meet an old friend, you get excited and start catching up on everything you are up with. The friend incidentally works in same company where you had interview. He tells lots of projects closing suddenly after upper management changed hands. He says, he himself is thinking of looking out.
And Then... AHA!

That's it! That was the reason!
Peace of mind! It's almost like seeing a bright sunlight after the dark clouds have passed over. Breeze.
And that my dear friend is a closure!

The new job you decided to take, does not feel so ordinary any more. You can still do wonders! Right?

Taking an example of professional life is probably a bit silly honestly.
You feel the actual heat in the personal life...

But, well you got the gist...

Tuesday, April 05, 2016

The Tortoise and The Hare

The age old story... 

Tortoise was annoyed with the Hare cause he always got teased for speed. So he challenged Hare for a race. Hare felt the Tortoise is stupid to propose such a thing, but decides to do it anyway, just for fun. 

Race starts. Hare runs as fast as he could. He gets tired, looks back and sees Tortoise is not even in his periphery of vision. 'Ah well, I am going to win anyways. Why tire myself, let me rest for a bit.' And Hare rests and quickly falls a sleep. Tortoise in the mean time continues to tread the land with slow steady pace. He passes Hare on the way. But he doesn't rest or slow down a bit. He stops only after reaching the end line. In the mean time, Hare awakes and realizes what has happened. He tries to rectify his mistake. But it's too late. 
Moral of story: Slow but steady wins the race!

Now, why am I recalling this now? 
Cause  my current behaviour is a bit similar to the Hare with a slight difference. 
There is no Tortoise in the race... Making it difficult for me to see the losses, but they are losses never the less. 

Ok, lets try little less abstract this time. 
It's typical of me to start taking on a new task which is seemingly challenging. I would check and figure out all that I find is important or unknown. Half ground covered. Then, I look at the progress and tell myself ok, covered substantially, lets slow down,. Why tire myself. So then I start walking... And after walking what looks like half of remaining part I realize, oh shit, its not 1/4th that was left. I have miscalculated. I am still left with 1/2!!! 
I start jogging and running again. 
Well, sure you reach the goal, but panting phew phew phew...

But surely I could have done it better more comfortably without tiring myself,if I would have just jogged all the way. 

I don't need to be the Hare. I don't need to run super fast in beginning which makes me yearning to slow down later.
I don't need to be slow as The Tortoise from the beginning either. 
It's about finding that right balance of speed with steadiness. 
Most importantly, it's sheer unnecessary to count or judge what's remaining. It will get over, when it will get over. It's as simple as that. 

New moral out of the old story. 

Damn, just makes me realise I may now just look at all old stories to find new meanings :D
One at a time, one at a time !